Diary of a Mother's Mission

My son, Kevin Martin, disappered under mysterious circumstances in the wee hours of July 18, 2004. His partial remains were found on February 1, 2005 in the river. The Des Moines Police have not been helpful and this is my blog to tell what I have done as it's done.

Wednesday, April 28, 2010

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Wednesday, April 07, 2010

The Beginning and the Ending

Today is a beginning of sorts. It's Kevin's birthday, April 7 th. Kevin would be 27 years old today, this year, 2010. As I've mentioned before, some anniversary dates, and there are a few of them, sort of slip by with a passing recognition or notice. Not Kevin's memory, though, as I think of him and include him in my prayers daily, morning, and night as long as I stay awake long enough to do so. Always morning, though, as I wake up and always allow myself enough time to pray for him and include him in my daily thoughts. This year I have been much more aware of his day for some reason, I don't know why, and it doesn't really matter, but this time I wanted to write a blog on his special day - something I haven't done in quite awhile.

So, this was his beginning 27 years ago and another beginning for me in many ways. Another child and he was a beautiful and special child as mother's always think. Each child is a new beginning. All the hope and love and potential but little did I know the ending at that time. His ending. There has been an ending of sorts. An ending of Kevin's life on this earth. An ending of our dreams for him, an ending of his unique potential. But there is also not an ending to this story as well. Six years have gone by and we still do not have closure and justice for Kevin and never will probably, at least not on this earthly plane. I've come to accept that somewhat.

There is still one more thing I have to do which I haven't done. I've gotten three copies of Kevin's records from the police department. They were not complete. I sat at the police dept. for two and a half hours the first time I made an attempt to get Kevin's complete record, while someone, probably one of the detectives who worked on the case, went through and picked and chose what was to be given to me. I had waited too long but I'm sure I would have gotten the same response at an earlier date. The second file had things in it that were not in the first file, the first file had things not in the second file, was out of order, stapled in sections. I still remember so vividly those first days, and weeks, and months, and so remember many things that should have been included but were removed. The file even makes reference to items that should have been included but were glaringly absent. I will try again.

Once again all the things surrounding Kevin's case has come to the fore, as it does periodically, when another missing person case reaches the media, as did the case of a young man from Ames, Iowa, who went missing, I think it was January 22 nd. Jon Lacina. He was 21 years old, as Kevin was, and even resembles Kevin, at least from the pictures anyway. They even showed one photo of Jon haming it up for the camera. I think I have a similar picture of Kevin with the same goofy expression! So sad that another family has to go through this nightmare.

This isn't the ending though. Kevin will never end, as none of us will end, as we are all eternal. His memory is here on earth, his remains, his possessions but his spirit soars. His consciousness and soul and personality live on and always will. So there is no ending to this except, perhaps, here on earth, which is only the shadow of the real world that Kevin lives in right now!